Fire Marshall Butternut to the rescue

After being sick as a dog for almost two weeks, I finally emerged from my cave and took in the nice weather we had today (Wed.). I had a pile of paychecks from clients sitting on my desk and I figured if I wanted to eat I might want to deposit them, so I took advantage of the weather and went for a walk to the bank. On my way south on Magnolia I took in the many sites that one usually experiences in Uptown, people walking dogs, parents sitting behind gates watching their children play, joggers, crack dealers at the corner of Wilson and Magnolia, gang bangers hanging out at Sunnyside Mall, a random crazy white dude yelling at the sky, and the thrill of spotting graffiti. Mostly a pretty uneventful walk, that is until I turned East onto Montrose.

Pretty much the second I took a left onto Montrose I smelled something burning. I looked around and couldn't see anything obvious so I kept walking hoping I would find the source. As I walked East I noticed a guy with a fairly large baby stroller walking towards me. Awe a baby, I thought to myself. It's pretty hard not to look at a baby and smile, of course, if the dude who spawned the child is a DICK, it's hard to keep that warm feeling. I am always amazed that there are people in this world who go out of their way to be jerk-wads. So I am getting ready to pass this guy, who is walking on the opposite side of the sidewalk, and what does he do with all the room he had, a split second before passing me he deliberately moves the stroller right in front of me which forced me off the sidewalk. After he passed me I stopped and turned around to the sound of a chuckle coming from this dumbass. Good thing I am a pretty mellow, and observant, guy cause the glance I got of his arm as he passed showed off a tattoo of a crown. Probably not the best idea to get in a fight with a dude who is crazy enough to use his kid as a weapon and just might be a member of the Latin Kings, so I just shook my head and kept walking. No more than 2 seconds later I found it. 

Just north of Montrose on Clifton was a bunch of small smoking pits in a mulch bed. I didn't have my phone on me but I was able to find a picture online that matches what I saw. Since it was pretty windy out, and there was a ton of new mulch all over the place,  I tried to put it out with my shoes. After a couple of minutes I realized I couldn't extinguish the fires without water so I went to the bank down the street and did something I am getting pretty good at lately, calling the Fire Dept. On my way back home I witnessed a fire truck at the scene and water everywhere, the smoke was out. Actually, they soaked all of the mulch around the entire building so who knows, maybe I kept someone's building from going up in flames. I need to start calling myself Fire Marshal Butternut.

It's a good thing I am observant but sometimes I'm just not that bright. Even though I now had money in the bank, it wasn't till I got home that I remembered I still don't have any food. So I grabbed my keys once again and returned to the great outdoors. Just another day in Uptown.